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Age is like an alligator
 "Age is a lot like an alligator... It waits just beneath the surface then it eats you alive."
Give someone a truly unique greeting card! (Perfect for someone getting on up there!) | Item # 279
Price: $2.95 |
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Birthday Puzzle
 "A birthday puzzle for you: This is an age-detection test! Simply identify the object in this extreme closeup. Your answer will directly reflect your age. Failure to identify the photo, for example, means that you're an old fart!... Yeah. I... | Item # 278
Price: $2.95 |
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Present in a Barrel
 "All the barrels look pretty much alike, don't they?... Yeah, I probably shouldn't have hidden your present in one."
Give someone a truly unique greeting card! (For the person who loves figuring things out.) | Item # 277
Price: $2.95 |
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Beat with a Book
 "Remember when you were a kid and your dad used to beat you on the head with a book?... Of course you don't. Now wipe that drool off your face."
Give someone a truly unique greeting card! (For the person who lost a few marbles along the... | Item # 276
Price: $2.95 |
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Hide the Body
 "We're gathering flowers to hide the body... We'd do anything for you mommy!"
Give someone a truly unique greeting card! (Show how what you're willing to do for her.) | Item # 275
Price: $2.95 |
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Just Won't Die
 "Happy Birthday... To the woman who just won't die."
Give someone a truly unique greeting card! (For the woman who keeps hanging on.) | Item # 274
Price: $2.95 |
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Poppy Fields
 "A life of slaving in the poppy fields is tough... But being as old as you must be tougher."
Give someone a truly unique greeting card! (For the Old Fart in the family.) | Item # 273
Price: $2.95 |
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64 Impala
 "This year for your birthday I decided to get you what you always wanted... A six-four Impala."
Give someone a truly unique greeting card! (Perfect get-back to the smartass in your life.) | Item # 272
Price: $2.95 |
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Beautiful Butterfly
 "Your mother always told you one day you would grow into a beautiful butterfly... SHE LIED."
Give someone a truly unique greeting card! (For the person who wants the brutal truth.) | Item # 271
Price: $2.95 |
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Hail Cthulu
 "Happy Birthday... All Hail Cthulu!"
Give someone a truly unique greeting card! (For the weirdness in us all.) | Item # 270
Price: $2.95 |
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Dad Blows
 "Happy Birthday to a dad who BLOWS."
Give someone a truly unique greeting card! (Let dad know how you feel this year.) | Item # 269
Price: $2.95 |
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Dead Twin
 "I wish...I WISH... I wish my dead twin would leave me the fuck alone."
Give someone a truly unique greeting card! (For the person who's always plagued by ghosts.) | Item # 268
Price: $2.95 |
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Take Your Time
 "Don't eat them all at once."
Give someone a truly unique greeting card! (For truly sick individuals.) | Item # 267
Price: $2.95 |
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Memory Loss
 "Hey! Remember your birthday party last year!?... Yeah, nobody else does either."
Give someone a truly unique greeting card! (For those who know how to party right.) | Item # 266
Price: $2.95 |
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Good Riddance
 "I'm sorry, why was it again that you were bringing me all the way out here?... I got rid of that guy who who was hassling you."
Give someone a truly unique greeting card! (Show them the lengths you'll go for them.) | Item # 265
Price: $2.95 |
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Crappy Present
 "I'm no old cowhand, but I'm wishing you a happy birthday... I'm sitting on this here fence, workin' on your birthday present."
Give someone a truly unique greeting card! (Let them know that you give a crap.) | Item # 264
Price: $2.95 |
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Full of Wonder
 "Why do we park on a driveway and drive on a parkway? If a word was misspelled in the dictionary, how would we know? Why do we say something is out of wack. What IS wack? What do sesame seeds grow INTO? Why does your nose run and your feet smell?... | Item # 263
Price: $2.95 |
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A Happy Birthday
 "A Happy Birthday. B Close Card. C Blow Out Candles. D I said blow out the candles, Bitch!"
Give someone a truly unique greeting card! (For the person who just can't seem to figure it out.) | Item # 262
Price: $2.95 |
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Yellow Cake
 "Go ahead Jimmy. I made it just for you. It's cake. Yellow Cake. Go on Jimmy, take a bite!... Yellow Cake (yel-oh-keyk) noun.: a processed oxide of uranium U308 extracted and concentrated from uranium ore and used as the raw material for... | Item # 261
Price: $2.95 |
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You Pervert!
 "To see the woman finish undressing, open this card... You Pervert!"
Give someone a truly unique greeting card! (Perfect for the pervert in us all) | Item # 260
Price: $2.95 |
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